Monday, February 25, 2013

Like a Tick Ready to Pop



This is Monday 2/25 -

In the week that has passed since my last entry I've done lots of thinking (probably about seven days worth, give or take). As such, my mind is engorged with topics like so much tick feasting on the tasty lifeblood of some unsuspecting dog. Allow me to symbolically pop said tick and shower you with the lifeblood of my thoughts -

This first bit of hot, salty vein juice comes from a realization I had this morning while going through my morning routine (I've written at length about my morning routine here). Recall with me the Coke vs. Pepsi (this blog is brought to you by Coke or Pepsi, whichever you prefer) like struggle between Taskmaster Jarrett (Ta-Ja) and Therapist Jarrett (The-Jar). Somehow, these two tyrants have procreated and birthed a fifth Jarrett. I shall call him "Taskapist Jarrett" - TPJ, if you will. TPJ uses all his knowledge from the various therapies ("slow and steady wins the race," "elbows over toes," "is that the best you can do?", and so on). This knowledge combines with Taskmaster Jarrett's Nazi like attention to time saving and produces what I can only describe as foresight. Listen, Ta-Ja is constantly on the lookout for ways to save time, The-Jar has been conditioned to be very observant of the environment to identify potential hazards (there are many for a guy like me). The-Jar spots a potential hazard (say, my wonky left arm knocking over my cup of coffee), he warns Ta-Ja; Ta-Ja fears a spill and the "unsanctioned activity" of having to clean it, so he tells, nay COMMANDS TPJ to move the cup to a safer location.

I've decided to add moving pictures ("video") to give you an idea of what I'm like in person; what's more, I plan to talk during this moving picture (making it a "talky"). I will continue to add moving pictures with talking ("talkies"). In the words of three lead non-blonde, "...and I try! Oh my God, do I try! I try all..." ...last night, to upload videos directly to this blog, but twoudn't work. Ergo, I decided to "broadcast myself" on YouTube. The first video can be found HERE. In this video,  I discuss why Coke is better than Pepsi (video brought to you by Coca-Cola: "Drink Fresh" - what is their slogan nowadays?). Actually, this video is just a short introduction.

The next video can be found by shouting "SHOW ME THE F'N VIDEO" very loudly at your computer screen, or you could just click HERE. This video is an in-depth discussion of why Pepsi is better than Coke (video brought to you by Pepsi: "Don't Drink Fresh, Drink Pepsi, DAMMIT!"). Actually, this video analyzes the data (say it with me now: "day-ta") that I collect when I walk around my apartment complex. I put this out there to give people like me an idea of how they can manipulate their environment and measure results.

One last thing, I have decided that I don't want to do "Timesavers" any longer. By now you know how anal I am about saving time, and in the irony to beat all ironies - trying to think of, remember, and write down A "Timesaver" every week has turned into an egregious unsanctioned activity.

FIN
@JarrettLWilson



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